time and dessert

If time was on our side. We would have crafted a perfect world just for ourselves. We could one by one overcome all obstacles. We could have outgrown everything. If time was just on our side. The two of us only.... we could have reached the stars and then start something new..... We would have been beautiful.... The prefect ones.... the examplary ones........ but time is not on our side .. so we make the best of what we have and ........ it may not be perfect .... it is still about us... the best we could achieve with the chains of time ............. the best!!! and one day when the chainz are gone and one day when time doesnt fly anymore... I will seek you out and I will create, based on the blueprints which are our dreams....I will create and I will call it heaven!

Usually I do not copy something else but here is a translation of a Poem in Pashto language which I just had to jot down here.... the translation that is:

"In a desert.. once on the hunt did I find...
a flower so fair... with a radiant smile....
Sadly, I approached and Sighed....
"Ah! Of my kind, are you too,
a hapless flower from a beloved's hair"
"Frail fingers would'nt take you to a soft face so close,
Nor will you be kissed by lips so delicate like a rose."
With a silent smile the flower replied:
"Don't loose Heart."
"This desert I wouldnt give up for the gardens of Iran,
A solitary I am here while legions like me are there,
Amidst this cursed soil I stand apart.
In this gray desert, I 'm a flame of divine light,
I 'm beauty's silent song, a miracle from the sky."
"In your garden, there are thousands of flowers....just like me...."
"A nameless droplet in a nameless sea!"
"Don't feel lonely in your desert,
To behold you at last shall come a sore hero (ghani khan)"

These words were written in Pashto by Ghani Khan (1914 -1996)

So what is the relation between these words and the words above ..... They both promise something... promise that there will be a rainbow one day...... I just wish the rainbow is gray !

life of the heart

There are people out there who love someone so much that they can do anything that they can to make the loved ones happy. They can tear their hearts out and create a beautiful world for the loved ones to live in but to live in with someone else... That someone else which can keep the loved ones happy for life..... there are people out there who can set up things for their loved ones so that their loved ones can forget about them and be happy... just be happy!
so what about these people .... these are great people ..... and heartless too because remember they tore their own hearts out to create a universe for their loved ones.....
so how diffiiclut is all this? All of us say that we can do this ..... but... (oh i just told someone very close to my heart that there will be no more buts so lets ignore this but). Let me rephrase. All of us say that we can do this ..... sheesh i cant think of another word except "but" :(
Lets just say it is as difficult as physically ripping your heart out....... If I find God then I will ask him.... why? why this love and then the ripping ... the taking of soul.....
Now these people understand after all this happens after their loved ones become happy after their loved ones are settled and they forget about the ones who loved them truly ... these people actually loose their soul... because these people can only love "their" souls so much ... so they loose their soul .... and trust me this is what is beind dead is all about.......
I will be remembered ... will always be remembered..... and then their is no one for the heart.
All the happines to you.... I pray you get all the happiness.... All the happiness that I planend for you and made sure you got .............

IDIOT... THAT IS WHAT I AM... AFTERALL I LOST IT "ALL" WHEN "ALL" WAS IN MY HAND